yesterday i noticed that my cat had neglected to eat his own food. intead he was eating his own feces. it was blue. i was wondering weather or not that they tasted better then the food i was giving him. so i decided to try both.
at first i had the food. it was rather fishy with and essence of happiness. i really enjoyed it. then i had the other BUT MAN THAT WAS GROSS. I CANT BELIEVE HE EATS THAT SHIT. I SCOLDED HIM THE REST OF THE NIGHT BY PURPOSELY MAKING ME INGEST THE FOUL OBJECT.
now he hates me. BECAUSE ALL CATS HATE MEN.
hey i am bernie
i have been away for awhile and i haven’t posted any shit it a while so here is a sentence.
i really think that lakes and beaches should allow cats! they would have so muh fun playing in the sand, even though they might occassionally poop in it, that doesnt matter. but i have a feeling i know why cats dont swim. its because of all those famous men swimmers. michael phelps is an option, he is such a great swimmer that cats are intimidated. i wuld be too if he was swimming next to me. but also CATS HATE MEN. they would probably attack them if they were in the water.
cats hate water because they hate men, it seem everything relates the their men hatred. i wish pookie went on the boat with me today, but FUCK MEN. I WISH POOKIE LIKED ME.
cats are gnarly
okay i was watching a teevee today and i noticed that there were no cat commercials. if someone wanted to sell me something i would hope there was a cat in the commercials. they would make a shit ton of money with on kitten in the background or something. get in it your heads companies, we need cats and want them. but if you are trying to sell something with a cat in the commercial make sure the product is for females. as we already know cats hate men so men hate cats, except for me cuz i have pookie!
anyway i have to get up early tomorrow cuz im going on a boat!
OH YEAH WE NEED MORE CAT SITTERS WHEN I GO OUT AND SUCH. if you can watch a child, why not watch a cat to keep it company! JEEZ